In closing I want to share something close to my heart that hopefully will drive home my point of the importance of live theater, even during a pandemic. I cannot find the words, but I will try...the audiences' energy was extremely heightened. When they laughed, they LAUGHED. When they cried it was more like audible weeping. They gasped more intently. They applauded with more vigor. We were giving them some sense of normalcy. Some sense of human connection that they hadn't felt in months. It truly was cathartic for them and us as performers. These were audience members who wanted to be there and were taking a risk themselves to do it. Their hearts were exposed in a way that it felt so vulnerable and sacred to be there with them. It has been one of the most spiritual experiences of my life.
So, for those who are critical of what I am doing, I get it. This is not for everyone. You have to do what is best for you in your given circumstances and only you can determine what shape that will take. I respect your journey. And I would ask that you respect mine. You may not understand, there were times I didn't understand, but I am catching a glimpse now of "why" I am doing this. It isn't just to be employed and to keep the theater in business...it goes deeper than those temporal things. For me it is something much deeper. I refuse to let fear paralyze this situation. If there is a way to do this, I'm going to do it. And, while I'm being transparent here, I have to admit that going into this I was completely open to the idea that it would fail. But so far, I have felt safe. I have felt taken care of. I have felt a sense of responsibility to take charge of what I can control, which is only myself. I look out for others by making sure that I am doing everything I can to stay healthy under the given circumstances.
There is no 100% guarantee with anything in life. We take risks everyday and each one of us is responsible for how much risk we are willing to take. I respect your limits and I ask that you respect mine, because this virus isn't going away any time soon. So, I am putting myself in the trenches along with just a handful of other actors. We are figuring this out not only for ourselves but for others when they are ready to open. Those of us who have been performing during 2020 will have so much to share. We will be in a position to give you the "what worked" list. Because we are more than a theater community, we are family. And sometimes we will be at odds with one another, but at the end of the day theater is a collaborative art form and we need each other.
Love, courage, and respect. Those are the things that art is rooted in. And from those roots we can bring our light to audiences who so desperately need us. So, keep moving forward and take heart.
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