Always...Patsy Cline Part I: A Dream Comes True

All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible." ~ T. E. Lawrence

In 2009 I saw that The Old Lyric Repertory Company would be holding auditions for "Always...Patsy Cline". I was drawn to this production and felt I would fit the role well both in looks and vocal quality. I practiced every day trying to emulate her. As I devoured her repertoire, my love and admiration for Patsy Cline deepened.

In early 2010 I arrived at the audition feeling prepared and accomplished. I was poised and ready to show this creative team what I could do. I had a strong audition and yet, towards the end of my time in the room I felt an odd sense (that most actors can relate to) that this group of creatives were being kind, but not particularly interested. I still held on to hope. I had worked for this theater many times before and thought that my body of work with them might keep me in the game...but I was wrong. 

They decided to go with another performer who had played the role before. (Three times in fact.) It made sense from a producer stand point. Patsy sings 26 songs in the show and to bring in an actress for summer stock, where rehearsals are limited, would be a huge risk. But, I knew in my heart I could have done it. I was devastated...and to make matters worse, they brought this actress in from Salt Lake City, so she already had the corner of the market on all of Northern Utah. Maybe a theater would do the show in Southern Utah? I could only hope. 

With that hope in my heart I continued to learn the songs from the show and I actually got to perform them sometimes for various events. There were two ironic performances at the Lyric Theatre! In 2013 they had a 100 Year Anniversary of the theater and I donned a black cocktail  dress and sang Crazy. I wrote in a previous blog, "One of the main highlights for me was living out a dream of mine to play Patsy Cline. Kris Bushman who directed the evening's show let me sing Crazy. It was pure heaven for me! Truly."

And then in 2017 the theater hosted an Anniversary Show for celebrating the 50th year of The Lyric Repertory Company and this time I got to wear one of the costumes from their production of "Always...Patsy Cline" and sing Crazy again! It was funny because when the producer asked me to do this Anniversary Show they assumed I had played the role of Patsy Cline. I told them, no, I did not get cast, but I would love to do it if the other actress was not available. They laughed and said, "Well, since you will already be a part of the show let's have you do it!" Sometimes it pays to be in the right place at the right time! 

And that leads me to Hale Centre Theatre's production of "Always...Patsy Cline". I'll never forget the way my heart leapt the moment I saw that they were doing the show. Then I saw the dates and realized that Maxwell would be coming home from his mission during the run. I talked to Roger about it and said, "I probably shouldn't do it." And he said, "Are you kidding!? You totally should! You have wanted to be a part of this show for years. You have to do it!" I knew he was right. By this time it was 2020, 11 years since I first auditioned for the Logan production. I set my heart on auditioning, and anyone who knows me understands that when I set my heart on something I am ALL IN. 

I started working on the material every day. I listened to Patsy's music in my down time. I watched clips of her on YouTube to get her mannerisms, her voice...every nuance I could take in. Then in September of 2020 I am having lunch with a friend from the theater and she told me that the producers were bringing someone in for the role of Patsy but they were starting to put their feelers out for a Patsy Cline understudy. They had asked a friend of ours if she would be interested in auditioning and she was unavailable. I learned from that conversation that they would most likely not be holding general auditions, this would be by invitation only. Again, with COVID and the nature of this show being so specialized, I understood why they would keep it on an intimate scale like that. 

Being privy to this information sparked something inside me...Now, I am not an aggressive person when it comes to networking in the theater, but as soon as I got home that day I sent an email to Mark Dietlein and said that I would be interested in auditioning for the Patsy Cline understudy. He immediately responded with this: 

"Thanks so much for reaching out. It is true, we are bringing in a Patsy Cline from Arkansas. Thanks for throwing your hat in the ring as the understudy. There is also her friend, Louise, who has a very fun role. It’s wonderful to know of your interest. You are extremely talented and a joy to work with. We’ll keep you informed as we move forward with casting which will be by invitation only." 

At first, my heart sank as he said that the part of Louise was a great role. I thought maybe they were thinking I was too old for Patsy (I would be 49 when the production rolled out). I worried about my age. But, I was also surprised that they weren't using the actress that did it in Logan and Salt Lake City. It was someone from Arkansas, cool! 

In January of 2021, 12 years after I had first started to prepare for the role of Patsy Cline, I walked into the theater for my audition. It had been narrowed down to me and my friend, Adrien Swenson (pictured above with me in an interview for "Deena and Javen at Regent Street"). We would both most likely be cast as Louise but that day we were vying for the role of "Patsy Cline Understudy". The person who was cast would learn both parts (Patsy and Louise) and be guaranteed the Saturday 12:30pm matinee to play Patsy. 

I sang first. I chose Lovesick Blues and Crazy. 

Guys...

It was the best audition of my life! I had never been so prepared and I felt like I had channeled Patsy. It was transcendental. At one point I saw out of the corner of my eye Sally, one of the producers, look at Mark, her husband with big eyes (above her mask) and it seemed to be a "wow" moment for her. I really don't think anyone in that room, including myself, realized that I had that in me. All of those weeks, months, YEARS of practice paid off. And even if I didn't end up getting the part. It felt absolutely brilliant. 

When I finished singing Adrien piped up, "Well...someone did her homework!" Adrien then did her songs and we both performed our monologues. It was so fun being Louise (I could relate to her as one of Patsy's biggest fans) and I knew that however this worked out, I would at least get to play her and be double cast with Adrien! I was completely fine with that. I was feeling good as we said our goodbyes, but then Sally asked to speak to Adrien privately. My heart sank. I went out to my car and cried. They were tears of relief, but also of disappointment. I was realistic about my age and knew that it could be a factor in not getting cast. After my brief breakdown, I collected myself and chose to focus on the joy and gratitude I felt for that audition.

I came home and told my family all about it. I truly felt that whatever happened was meant to be. I had done the best I could have done and now it was out of my hands. Two hours later I got a call from Tammy, the executive administrative assistant at Hale, and she offered me the part of Louise...and then she said, "...AND we would love for you to play the Patsy Cline Understudy..." I just started to cry. I thanked her way too much and hung up the phone. Then I got a call from our director, Kelly DeHaan. He said some magical things to me that I can't fully remember because I was preoccupied with happiness. I hung up the phone with him and hugged Roger for a while as I wept.